The Espresso Machine of Coffee Bay.

Coffee bay is one of those places off the beaten track that all the travelers were raving about. It's an unspoilt paradise away from it all. And I do mean away. It was a 6hr drive just to the connecting shuttle for another 2 hour shuttle from Durban.

However long it took it was worth it. The scenery was nice. The people were great. It was the first time in South Africa I felt relaxed. Don't get me wrong there was still the stark element of haves and have not. But the local Xhosa people appreciated the backpackers and what it financially brought to their town. Many had jobs as a result.

Ended up extending a day here it was so good. And then also wanted to complete a specific walk to a local natural bridge.

Oh and I learn a valuable lesson. When the guide says duck when climbing into vehicle, really duck. I have a stamp on the forehead to remind me.

Everything here is still at genuine South African prices. 11 Rand for a standard 330 ml can of beer. I've been going high end by sometimes getting an vodka and mixer for 15 rand. I love the prices here.

Oh and a word of warning. If you get an invite to try the local maize based alcoholic drink. Pass. See the below photos. It may help you understand.

 

Long haul to Durban and beyond

After completing the Kruger tour it was time to hit the road. And well with the limited time available I was on the long haul leaving Dodge City to Durban. On reflection I should have done 2 nights at the Drakensberg Mountains. They were quite a sight to drive past.

Arrival in Durban was eye opening. It was the beginning of seeing some normality return to what we expect when we see western cities. Still you can see far from being like home.

The hostel in Durban Tekweni was in a great spot just off a safe restaurant street. However the hostel itself was tired, and the staff higher than most of the international guests. It was thankfully only a short a one night stay and onto the bus at 7 am.

In fact Durban was so brief I barely got the camera out.

Blyde Canyons

Final day of the Kruger Tour and no Kruger, but still good.

Today was the big return drive. However with alternative route to the arrival. We travelled via the Blyde River Canyon. The 3 biggest "real canyon". As defined by canyons with permanent water course through it. The biggest being the Grand Canyon. The 2nd in Namibia.

Awesome view!

Alas that was the highlight of the day.

Hippos put the Hip into Kruger

Day 2 inside the Kruger Park started with the review of progress. After day 1 in the park we still had Lepards, Cheetah, Hippos and Lions on the list.

Of note it was this morning I started a new hobby buying Camera memory cards. Alas my camera was filling fast. Alas the new card wasn't compatible.

So the focus was cats, as hippos were a sure thing. So what did we find all morning. Elephants of course! Even after a morning break and additional failed memory card we returned to more elephants.

However it was not disappointing. We got a herd of elephants. Including a mother and baby, and 2 adolescent males trying to show us we were getting to close and they were boss. Not as convincing as the day before with the big bull.

However enjoyable it was to sit and watch elephants we had other big 5 to find. Lions. And we had received intel that a pride had just made a kill and were sitting eating only 7kms away. It was the longest ever 7kms ever. Not in just time. However we found them. To our surprise it was an unusual pride I makes. Probably a father and his 3 sons exiled and banding together to hunt. A definite pecking order existed.

From there it was off to the river and our hippo guarantee. Hippos didn't disappoint. Especially the baby hippo. Still you don't mess with hippos. They were though only swimming the whole time.

As we attempted an exit and final animal sighting we did find above ground hippos. Otherwise known as Hungry Hungry Hippos.

And as all things come to an end. On exiting Kruger the last day I found the right memory card. Alas I had other issues now. Low battery.

I was a piece of Lion bait!

Kruger national park is where many tourist of the world go to get their real life experience of the "big 5". Lions, leopards, buffalo, elephants and rhinos.

I actually without thinking made a great choice before leaving Joburg. My accommodation on the eastside of Joburg meant I was nearly the last to be picked up before the tour bus departed. My second win was when the tour guide said was my tour was to be me and 8 ladies. The tour guide was quite chuffed to point this out before I even hopped on. 2 Spanish, 2 Danish, a Frenchie, Swede, German, and an Israeli.

First stop of course was obligatory but educational. The service station. I learnt 2 things. Food is cheap. And south Africa loves meat pies. Woo hoo! A fall back food option for this trip with so much road distance planned ahead.

After a 5 hr journey we made our first experience. Hoedspruit Endangered Species Wildlife Reserve. A wildlife park set up with the intention of protecting Cheetahs and other animals. Research and breeding centre for animals. Pretty much a zoo as most animals there could never go back into the wild. Here we would experience our first "baiting". We were loaded into game vehicles in rows of 3 and then driven around. Paraded in front of their resident wildlife like a treat is shown to pets. I even had a cheetah take a liking to my side of the vehicle. As if waiting for me to fall out. Nice kitty!

Each day on the trip would then follow the format. 5 am start and Rack baiting the car with tourist. Exotic meats. Except I had learnt. I took the middle seat. Never on the wrong side, and always one tasty treat away from the lions reach. An adapton to the self preservation technique of "being the 2nd slowest runner".

As bait we were paraded in front of many impala and buffalo with excitement early on. Until we realised they were vegetarian. Interest improved with Zebras and giraffes. But still no takers for the bait.

Night time brought a night safari drive on a private park. This was amazing. We used an alternative seating plan but no buyers for the international menu. Couldn't interest the white rhino with baby, nor the glimpse of the extremely rare black rhino.

At least the Hyena's will think I'm funny and laugh.

Joburg. Where did I go?

The answer was nowhere. That's what most people do when they get to Joburg.

Sadly Joburg doesn't have a great recent history for travel. Everything I read. Everything I heard said "don't bother'. My hostel owner was able to say it was fine to walk up the street to the shopping centre. After meeting others it's not a liberty all hostels can say holds true.

It wasn't an inconvenience. I only arrived at the hostel at 5pm. And was leaving at 7:30am.

The Japanese whaling ship plane tour

The start of the trip here in 2012 ha already brought it's own surprise. Even before getting to South Africa. The flight goes via the shortest route. Basically passing within 100kms of Antartica. Quite a thing to see icebergs out the window for a few hours. And when they're visible from 39000ft you know they're big. It gave 5 minute of diversion from the tedious monotony of another long flight.

Alas difn't see any Japanese "science fleet" being stalked by whale huggers.

New year. New trip. But still a Risk.

I'm back.

2012 finally brings a new holiday overseas. Return of the blog.

I'm not even out of the country and I'm been assessed as an unsuitable risk. I got the bomb residue test at Brisbane!

Seriously I think there were some very nervous party people going through the security gate. Those who arrived straight from the clubs after attending the Soundwave concert last night in the city looked a lot more dubious. Surely the green haired goth in front was checked. Or were they just a misundrstood group of fine upstanding individuals who merely had a rough upbringing involving a nail gun piercing and a permanent marker. My bad.

I think they're just all happy that the residue test doesn't scan all drugs. Or perhaps the Brisbane security were happy to export the problem to Sydney.

Next stop. South Africa.

Other sights and sounds of Halong and Hanoi

Ok so it's been a few weeks now since I returned. And well I never did finish off the posting onto the blog. So here is a more detailed viewing of photos for you all to see.

A bit more of Vietnam.

In case you were wondering yes crossing the road is interesting in Hanoi. There's nothing like a game of Hanoi Frogger. It doesn't though take long before you've got nerves of steel and have no problem with just edging out between 30 scooters to cross a road.

Halong Bay on the other hand replaces the scooter with the 2 stroke. Imagine the sounds of a 2 stroke mower going putt, putt, splutter as it goes on by. You can almost feel the serenity.

Yes Chef!

It wasn't Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmare by any stretch. Nor was this any school lunch by Jamie Oliver. This was Vietnamese Cooking 101 with some random chef from the Highway Four Restaurant, and 9 foreigners with a fang for food.


I have now been shown how to cook
Vietnamese Banana Flower Salad
Shrimps Sauteed with Cashew Nuts
Sour Fish Broth
and Imperial Spring Rolls.

And all I remember was the Sweet Chilli dipping sauce was fantastic. And I didn't even get to make that part of the dish.

Marking off the collection of Communist Revolutionary Leaders with Big Egos

Bingo!

Yep at this rate I'll be yelling out Bingo before everyone else. Because I'm now up to 2 Communist Leader Mausoleums. I did Lenin the other year in Moscow.

I now have Uncle Ho's.


It leaves only Mao in Bejing,
Fidel in Cuba, who we all think is not alive.
And that crazy North Korean one from the "Team America" movie whom we all wish wasn't around.

I didn't go in I must admit. If you look at the photo closely. That's the queue leading out to the left of shot. I've done the freaky wait in line to see a dead person for over an hour before. That's just weird if I did it again.

Halong Bay 2 night tour

Ok I've been to Halong Bay. Mission accomplished.

It was not though with picture perfect weather.

After a 3 hour drive traveling only 100 or so kms away. Yes its a slow drive when you're in Asia. Longest involuntary game of chicken with oncoming trucks and mopeds you can play.

The bay is actualyl spectacular. The first afternoon was taken up by traveling to the main cave sightseeing point. Quite surprising.
The 2nd day we had our first ever prisoner exchange. Whereby myself, 2 Swiss, 3 Canadians, and 4 French were exchanged for a a mix of other nations on another boat. Some would say it was because we were on the 3 day tour and not the 2 day tour. But it was as if they were experienced in the process of exchanging us.

After the exchange we headed out to our 2nd day of touring. This entailed a bicycle ride on one part of Cat Ba Island before trekking up a hill into a cave and back.


After which we visited monkey Island. And well lets just say Monkey King is not nice monkey. Our experience was that of our guide feeding the monkeys, and then the Monkey King starting to turn on the tourist when he spotted bigger bags. At which point a valid point was made. Avoid the monkeys biting you unless you want rabies shots. After the monkey feeding was done we were left on the beach, a dozen or so scared tourist on monkey patrol while sun baking, waiting for the monkeys to pounce looking for bags to rummage. Frankly this description of bag thieves would suggest they were actually just former Bus Depot employees. But I have photos of monkeys.

Finally we made out way to the night's destination of Cat Ba Island. Or well the tourist strip. It's a high rise strip of hotels with floating fishing boats in front. So there's a stench of rotting fish to enjoy.

Personally I think I've now just slept on the base of an ensemble bed missing the top matress. Good for the posture they say.

I been to Hanoi, and now Banan' Hanoi

When you get onto a good thing you stick with it.

Hence I went back to the Fanny Ice Cream place. This time I had to have the Banan' Hanoi. Only because it had the cute little hat.

I've gotten my cultural fix.

Sure this place may have been a french culture. It may pride itself on being a artistic centre in Asia. But ask what is the hottest ticket in town and you'll find out it's a ticket to the Water Puppets.

Best way to describe it is... It's Punch and Judy on Water.


Sadly though it is now the most meaningful way I have learnt about the Vietnamese culture.

I still reckon it's chicken!

I'm now 2 days into the Hanoi experience. And yet to see Dog or Cat on the menu. But it doesn't mean it isn't.


I mean sure. It may say chicken, or pork, or beef. But how can I be sure. Really.

Well it ain't certain but last night I'm pretty sure it wasn't pigeon. Yes pigeon was on the menu served with honey.


But to prove in my head that I will not have strange urges in the future just to fly home I point out to you that Pigeon is a small bird. Yet my meal had a drumstick. And there are no pigeons in the Hanoi City Centre. (Or they're in hiding.),

So on this flawed unrelated train of thought I have convinced myself it wasn't pigeon.

Sure I do not have absolute proof. But can you make a pigeon into this?

I didn't see the lady with a pigeon Feather Duster for sale. There is only real chicken feather on that there stick.

Alas customs will not be having to tell me that I can't bring a feather duster through customs.

They just can't stop staring at my big Dong!

Everywhere I go the Vietnamese women keep asking to see it. They keep asking for it. I just don't know what to say.

Check out my Big Dong. Don't be shy. It doesn't bite.


Sure it may look just like everyone else's Dong. But it must be good or they wouldn't keep asking for it.

Perhaps they're excited by its size. Because every time they say something, they then ask to touch my Dong. They then take it in their hand, and hand me back a smaller Dong. They love my Dong so much they then shower me with gifts when handing me back smaller dongs.

Danger Will Robinson, danger!

Last night marked a weird moment for the hotel here in Hanoi. They had a weird crazy women ranting outside. She was actually getting quite violent waving her motorbike helmet around. Even attacking a staff member with it. We all have no idea what it was about.

Luke and Sarah, the Australian hotel managers could do nothing but hide up the back with the rest of us. It was as if she was pissed off at the hotel. Perhaps for bringing in the tourist or pissed off at the hotel taking her customers away.

The lady just stood on the step trying to incite the crowd watching her into flooding into the hotel and join her in screaming. Perhaps it was an attempted shakedown. Who knows.

All I got to see was the Vietnamese business partners ended up sorting it out. They spent the time up the back on the phone.

I got entertainment for a half hour.

Luke, Sarah, if you're reading this. I had your back if it went down. I would have put on my best french accent, and then re-enacted the best french retreat since Vietnamese independence.

I got a Cylco today

Hardly a person missed out reminding me of the unfortunate experience 2 years ago when I was last in Asia. There was a resounding be careful before I left.

Today I arrived into Hanoi, Vietnam. I organised a "Private Car" to get from the airport to the hotel. Thankfully I've done my research and ended up with a good hotel, Hanoi Rendezvous Hotel. A good hotel with a Brisbane couple managing the joint. If you can't trust another Brisbane person who can you trust.

Anyway after dropping the bags I set out. Set out in search of direction. Which I still lack. I tried following the map. Really I did. But I can say without a doubt I have no idea how these streets lay out. The only positive I can say is that my previous travels have me unconcerned at "playing Frogger" crossing the road.

After finding my direction of north and south I managed to find the centre of Hanoi, the Hoan Kiem Lake.

Around the lake there are lots of locals sitting around enjoying the scenery. Around the edges are examples of Engrish for photography. Fanny. Who calls an ice cream shop Fanny. Really.

What is described as a lovely walk watching the locals partake in exercise was actually a walk watching locals partake in English practise. I sat for a mere moment before being approached by a lass asking to practise her English. Yes I was on high alert for a fraudster wanting to lead me elsewhere. But she ended up really being someone who wanted to practise her english. I really wasn't a good subject. My defenses were right up.

Anyway. By this time I was feeling a bit tired. So I went and grabbed a "Cyclo". After all I would dare not get a Moto rider!

Cyclos are good. To be precise they are one scoop Stawberry, Mango, and one scoop of I think macadamia.


No I didn't try getting in the back of a real cyclo. It was a walking day. The other Cyclo had satisfied my need. To say the least the scene after the photo above was a cyclo massacre. Strwberry everywhere down the waffle cone seat. But I was on the scene with spoon cleaning up the mess quickly. That's the kind of guy I am.

I didn't even leave the airport before the funny photos appeared

What's funnier than engrish.

Yep it's tough to think of anything when you come across examples like this as you leave the airplane.


If you can't read it into being funny. Then you don't get my humour.

I'm not kidding when I tell you this was the first add I saw as I went to walk up the ramp to customs. What's really disturbing is the kids playing in the background.

I'm Tuning up for tomorrow.

I've just gotten into KL for the 1 night stay. Staying at the airport at the TUNE Hotel. Malaysia's version of a cheap hotel like the Super 8. And we'll it's what you'd expect for a $40 room.

But main thing is it's only 500m from the airport. Good position when you have a 6:30am flight tomorrow.

I still love cheap flights

This week I'm off to Vietnam. Just for a week. Because I can.

Can't but go forthe price. The flights have cost me all up less than $600 return to Vietnam. And that's after me lashing out and spending an extra $40 each way to get extra leg room.

Hopefully I'll find an internet cafe along the way so I can keep you all up with my latest mis-adventure.

I bought a guide book

South Africa.... it's time.

Go East!

So when you live on the east coast and someone says "we should go east". Where do you go?

To Byron Bay of course.


Steve and I headed to Byron Bay just for the day, with couchsurfer in tow. Just because we had both never really been to Byron. Or well I had been there overnight briefly but had never seen the beach.

And when at Byron you get a photo outside of the sign of "Australia's Most Eastern point".

But there is controversy. This point when standing at the viewing area doesn't seem to be the most east position. There is a little bit of a point down the cliffs about 100 metres away which seems more easterly. I put it down to the marketing department didn't want to have people climbing down a steep walkway.

Advantages of being a Queenslander

To be able to call oneself a Queenslander has its advantages. And they're not all obvious.

Take for example the "My Fun" card. The purchase of this card is restricted to residents of Queensland. It gives us unlimited entry to Seaworld, Movieworld, and Wet'n'Wild for about 9 months.

That is our compensation for having people from the south come over the border at will.

What's cheaper!

Rank the following items in order of their cost from most expensive to cheapest

1. A train ride from Sydney Airport to the City. About 15kms I think it is.
2. A 5km Cab ride from Brisbane City to Coorparoo where I live, and
3. A flight from Gold Coast Airport to Sydney on Jetstar.

If you answered 2 then 1 and then 3 you'd be correct.


A Cab ride home cost me $18 usually. ($20 bucks if you're talking graveyard hours).

The flight to Sydney was $11 after paying the $2 or so credit card booking fee.

And the train ride was $14.60.


That's right for the Ekka Show Day local public holiday Steve and I were not in Brisbane. Cheap flights made for one hell of a great day trip away from Brisbane.

I couldn't believe it when Steve told me he got us tickets. Glad he did book.

We spent only about $60 each for transport for the whole day to get to and from Sydney.

Sure 10 hours in Sydney doesn't seem like a lot of time. But it's enough time to see the big sites in the city centre. With enough time leftover to meet a friend, and find beer. German Beer.

I love German Beer. And Sydney gets a massive ratings upgrade thanks to it's new (to me) Lowenbrau German Beer Hall.

A win for all on that day of travel.

One Capital left.

In terms of seeing Australia I now have 1 left. One more capital city and I've seen the lot.

Fortunately for Adelaide they were not last. Darwin will be last. Luckily for Adelaide they had more cheap flights with Tiger Airways to direct me there.

Merely a weekend was allocated to seeing Adelaide. A trip with only a few goals.
1. See the Don Bradman Statue outside the Adelaide Oval
2. Go do a Winery Tour, and
3. Eat a Pie floater

I managed 1 + 2.



So I did fail to complete a goal. So perhaps a second trip will be required. Any excuse to see another winery valley will do really.

I missed a brewery tour. Shame on me!

Beer and Churches. That's what history preserves I say.

And therefore as a result I like to tour these places which have been preserved in this tradition. All in the expectation that I'll again get to hear from the tour guides how refined and revered the local brewery chief was to the local population.

It is with great regret that I must admit I missed one.

I didn't have time in Hobart to see the Cascade Brewery. Bad Chad, bad. It wasn't for the lack of trying. It was just that they don't run the tours on public holidays.

High flying...

Tiger Airways has a lot to answer. Like how long do I have before they figure out that I'm just using them for cheap flights and don't buy drinks on board?

Another weekend away for me. This time I paid $55 to get from Gold Coast to Melbourne. Return. Inclusive of fees and taxes.

And then $77 to get from Melbourne to Hobart. Return.

How's that work? Don't ask. Just accept and collect the boarding pass.

The Claytons Travel report

When is a trip not a trip for me? When it's not overseas.

However by most standards it is still a trip. So with that in mind I thought I'd just post some recent trip photo highlights.

First we have Melbourne.


This was a classic boys trip away. Tony, Steve and I were off to the football. Our (Steve and I) first ever AFL game at the MCG.

Brisbane was against Richmond. We won. That made our night. Can't say it was the case for the locals.