Chad is home

I know this is the news everyone has been waiting for.

I'm home.

Arrived very late last night.

Now I've go a lot of stuff to sort out.

Beware of the Ladyboys (warning contains adult content)

Think of the most sexually repulsive conversation you've ever had with someone and then multiple it by a billion. That is exactly how I would explain the conversation I had with a Ladyboy as I passed by walking to my hotel in Chiang Mai. I can recall this conversation with upmost accuracy due to its horiffic nature. It went like this:

Ladyboy: Excuse me, where you going?
Me: To bed.
Ladyboy: I come with you.
Me: No.
Ladyboy: Me suck you.
Me: No
Ladyboy: Me f^&* you
Me: No
Ladyboy: Me lick you
Me: No
Ladyboy: awe, come back mister.

And there endth the conversation as I had gone out of range. Whew!

Now put this in prospective. The dude, or used to be a dude, still looked and sounded like a dude. Big shoulders can't be hidden when wearing a black cocktail dress. And well make up can only do so much. This was not eye candy. And to my endearing friends, no just because 'beggars can't be choosers' is a theory you may hold with me in jest, there is no counter argument.

Cooking with Dumbo

Cooking School Goals

Chiang Mai Cooking School. that was all I was thinking when I chose Bangkok as a destination on the Round the World ticket.

Its a scary thought but I've been wanting to do a Thai Cooking Class for years. I've just never put Thailand at the top of the list of places to visit before. But with an around the world ticket and a city to stop in within Asia, Bangkok won out this time. So for the past few months I've been thinking of how do I complete this goal.

Chiang Mai is just 1 hour away from Bangkok. And well things weren't looking too good for it as a destination considering a recent plane crash with a budget airline in Chiang Mai. But I persisted by going with Air Asia and not the 1-2-Go. Otherwise known as 1-2-Explode. Couldn't help but go, considering the flight ticket cost me only 1700 baht or 60 Australian dollars inclusive of taxes. Yeah, gotta love the purchasing power here.

Anyway after arriving in Chiang Mai at 8pm the first goal was to get orientated. And what better way then to go to the night markets. As had been done in Bangkok on arrival. Still didn't buy anything. But found how much I was going to enjoy Chang Mai. It cost me 30 baht for Thai Red Curry with Chicken in a food court at the markets. Wow. $1.25 Australian. How cool is that. So needless to say I ate myself silly in Chiang Mai. Now I say food court, not food stand. By this time I was happy to eat at this level of place. A halfway point. If I couldn't see unsafe handling practises then it was okay.

The first day of exploring I spent walking around the old town around. Going from Temple to Temple. Unlike Bangkok I actually found great local hospitality. This time in the form of an off duty Police Sargent who came to my assistance when I looked to the map. He then proceeded to give me a place and guidance on the expected street lights, and when to turn for directions. Funny thing is he saw me about an hour later looking to the map again as he passed by in a tuk-tuk. He got out of the tuk-tuk and gave me more guidance. Never got that sort of hospitality in Bangkok from on the street. By the end of day 2 I was Templed out. No more Thai Temples for me for this trip.



Day 3 I had booked the cooking school. It was cool. The day consisted of cooking 6 dishes, and a few little things like visiting the markets, an explanation of the different local vegetables and curries. I have now the ability to cook a Thai dish or 2 from scratch. And I even experienced flaming up the wok as you can see from the below pictures. For those wishing to experience 'Chad's Thai Dinners' then you'll have to ask nicely. You can see too that I can do either a non spicy Pad Thai, and 'fire in the hole' Penang Curry.

Trekking Thailand

Day 4 and 5. I was trekking. Yep me trekking. I was with not much more than a small backpack and walking stick. It was belting down monsoonal rain in the afternoon, and worst of all I felt dirty from the mud everywhere. Yuck! My preciously clean office hands were covered in dirt. Of course I had the obligatory slip over on the walk. But everyone did considering we were climbing up and down to our overnight stay in the hill tribe. The accommodation was a traditional building with not much more than a toilet. The shower was basic and cold water. The kitchen well that was interesting, I had to forgo my rule of no dodgy prepared food. I am still alive. Of course there was no power though so luckily I had purchased a torch in advance.

Within the 2 days though wow what a time I had. I rode Dumbo, or well actually I nicknamed him Donkey. Donkey was a big elephant. A patient stubborn one he was. He just stood there as every other elephant over took him when it came to the waterhole break. I think he was still pissed off that neither I nor the French guy sharing the ride had bought him bananas. Should have bought the bananas. We had a very snubbed trunk coming up at us every so often.


On the second day of the trip we white water rafted, and then Bamboo rafted down the river. I even got to be co driver with the big stick. Double bonus points. Shame I haven't got a photo of it to prove it.

Man who goes through door sideways

Yes thats right I've been to Bangkok. But it was closed.

Or well that's what the nice gentlemen on the street kept telling myself and the other hostel people everytime we arrived at the major tourist destinations. These nice gentlemen also seemed to have a great plan of action to take instead. It involved visits to several other 'free' temples, and a cheap tuk-tuk for the day.


Unfortunately if you said anything along the lines of I'm thinking of traveling to Chiang Mai you were stopping off at a travel agent. And if you mentioned you wanted to find somewhere to eat, then off course it was off to the tailor for a suit for you. These guys are why there is the saying 'being taken for a ride'. Don't be thinking you can live with the extra stops at the shops for a cheap tuk-tuk. That you can just go in and out of the shop and on your way. The tuk-tuk driver needs his free fuel, so you always had to go back inside for 5 minutes more. It's a shame the tailor had the most horrendous shirts. The extra 5 minutes would not have seemed so long.

Yes it does suggest I fell for these guys once.


Now I'm not the quickest learner, but still I do learn from mistakes. So when myself and my Italian friend from the hostel arrived at the Grand Palace at 3:15pm only to be told it was closed, it was disappointing, but still worth going in to take a look. After all the guard at the gate signaled us to come on in, and the big sign said it was open until 3:30pm. This was a revelation, yes someone saying a place was open. It was open, tickets were on sale until 3:30pm, the Palace gardens etc were open until 4:30pm. Plenty of time to take a look.


The first day I arrived was an experience. I managed to avoid the scam taxi ranks thanks to my Indian travel experiences, and internet research. Take the cab at the rank, and make sure the cab driver uses the meter. Always a good rule in Thailand. The hostel where I was staying. Wow, five star oasis in the middle of nowhere. I'll take that escape from the busy streets of Bangkok everytime. The manager is a very nice guy, and really takes care of his guests. Being a Sunday he made sure of our plans for the day. Sent a few of us to the Weekend markets. Now I've seen markets before, but gees this was massive. There are apparently over 9000 stalls. I saw but a few hundred before my jet lag indifference to shopping enabled me to suggest an escape with my fellow Bangkok newbie.

A Scottish contingent were part of the crew staying at the hostel. They were kind enough to invite me along for their trip into Patpong. Yes its the red light district. In the future be understanding if you see me cringe at the sight of a ping pong ball flying my way. It's now a natural reflex.

Sadly I lost my mobile phone that night getting out of the cab. It was never found.

The Scottish contingent might I just add (because it's funny) were not as lucky as myself and my Italian counterpart in traveling around Bangkok. After they suggested we visit the Ancient City on day 3 we proceeded to take the offer of assistance from our hostel manager who suggested a mere 300 baht taxi ride. They had arranged the same trip via their travel agent. I enjoyed the ancient city. We're still not sure what the Scots visited. It did make for a great conversation that evening when we tried to establish why we didn't see them there as planned. Their faces when we established we had seen different places, classic. I felt their disappointment. And to think their travel agent only charged them twice per person what we paid in total.


Bangkok did not overcome my fear of street side Asian food stalls. There is something about seeing meat just sitting on a bench without refrigeration which makes them so not appetizing. Shame I can't just go up and ask for the Salmonella Stir fry. If they actually spoke English I'm sure they'd reply without blinking, 'chicken ok, yes'. Oh and the other thing against these stalls. They smell. Now usually I love cooking smells. After all I love food. But somehow these places make everything smell bad. There's nothing like the gag reflex of walking the streets of Bangkok.

Oh and I wish to report an assault. But is it assault when I paid for a massage. Situation was I went to get a traditional Thai Massage. I had to. After all I was in Thailand. My first ever massage. Now when you think of a female Thai masseuse you're probably thinking nice gentle small lady who smiles a lot whilst nodding her head. This lady was not small but did laugh a lot. Primarily to the faces I'd pull every time she tried pushing my leg muscles to being inside the bone. And then also to the look of concern and fear which generated as I had no idea what was next and what new angle she wanted to wrap my legs into. I'm sorry but I wasn't to know that Thai massage was human body Japanese origami. I'm sure several times she just twist and turned me, laughed as I winced in pain, and then spoke to her counterpart beside saying, 'look a crane'. At which point they both laughed in unison. In retrospect we're not even sure whether I was beaten up by a lady. She had big shoulders. The good news is that the day after I felt good. Although for the first few hours after I was a blithering idiot making no sense. One of the Scots looked at me as if I needed to point to the doll where the bad man touched me. I couldn't string sentences.

Traveling is not all just Croissants and history

If you're in Paris thats exactly what you do. Eat like the French, drink like the French, and be like the French, unless they're rude.

Paris we figured to be a great place to meet up again. So Steve (my brother), and friends Darren, and Jason all met here. traveling from different parts of the world. So this is now the 3rd time I've been able to catch up with Daz in Europe, and this time Steve was here too. In retrospect this is still a cool concept however many times I repeat it. Being able to send a message to a friend to say, 'so which country we meeting in this time'. Perhaps you should try it if you've not already.


Paris may of been where the World Cup Rugby was being played but somehow we ended up timing the trip to the 4 days where there was no Rugby to be seen. Go figure.

But there were people to see, places to do. By the fourth day we were masters of the Paris Metro.

Here is just a taste of what we experienced.

Achieving ones goal in the Greek Islands

I love the Greek Islands.

Sure the beaches might not be upto the standard of the ones back home but hey it was more than just the sand there.

The islands are a world to themselves. Perhaps this is why when you get there everyone working there seems to have arrived for 2 days and never left.

I visited 2 islands. The first being Santorini. The second Ios. My choices were perfect. I had a great time at both. And each brought their own quality to the experience. Santorini was the sights, the food, and the architecture.






Ios was my party it up fun nights with lazy beach days.



I would go back to both in a heartbeat.

Cheese Pies, Ferries and Chewing Gum

When you get stuck in Athens for an extra day due to high winds canceling ferries to the Greek Islands you do think that the weather is going to be much better the next day. Or well that must of been what I was thinking.

Anyway I managed to book a ferry out of Athens on the Monday. First stop Santorini. I chose this island as the first port of call as I figured it was the furtherest island in the Cyclades which I would visit. What a bad call that was.

The fast ferries are nice flash looking Catamarans larger than the Brisbane City ferries. You are assigned a seat on the boat, so after taking my seat I thought it would be plain sailing. After all it was only a 4 hour journey. My seat was towards the front, and in the middle. Near the snack bar.


As I said it was to be a 4 hour journey. So I couldn't resist. After all nearly everyone else visited the snack bar too. And there in lies my mistake. I looked at the menu and thought, hmmm cheese pie, sounds good. For those uninitiated to the cheese pie it is a puff pastry filled with cheese. My previous experience with these had been good, having been filled with a Gouda cheese. This time though it was a rougher Feta Cheese. Why oh why I didn't remember to consider I was on a boat I don't know.

Anyway the boat started cruising out from the bay in nice calm waters. I managed to get a nap during boarding before we actually departed. But then it all went wrong. We hit open water. Smaller fast boats as I discovered weren't big enough to go through the wave action. They go up and down, side to side. Now side to side I can handle, it was the up and down that made me woosey. At this point I started to moan 'damn cheese pie'. I was catching a ferry on a day after 2 days of canceled ferries and ordered the diary food included pastry. Not good.

Anyway after about an hour we made it to the first stop. I was doing ok. I had been running a sweat for a second but starting to feel better. The 15 minutes in the calm waters of the ferry terminal helped. But in between the first and second stop whoa did it get rough. It also go dark outside. So no longer could you prepare yourself for the next sway. Then all of a sudden I noticed the ferry staff walking up and down the boat carrying wads of sick bags. Not a good sign. The weakest fell, and it was all over red rover. We had a barfing convention on board. The ups and downs were too much. Thank goodness I didn't have a seat near a bin.

Sadly it strain came to much and I too become a victim. In fact I'd say over 75% of the boat were carrying a brown paper bag. Anyway enough of the details.

After arriving in at the 2nd port two fellow passengers in the seats besides saw my plight. They saw I wasn't in the best shape. They offered me some chewing gum saying it might help. Gosh that was the best ever chewing gum I've ever encountered. I just sat there concentrating on chewing. Sitting as low as I could in the seat chewing. for the next 3 hours. I had survived the remainder of our 5 hour 'semi fast' boat ride.

I don't even remember what flavour the gum was. I didn't care. That chewing gum was my solution to everything on that ferry.

Greek Scrabble

Now I knew when traveling here it was going to be tough to read the signs. Perhaps I was a little naive as to how hard.

When you combine the constanants from the English alphabet which are worth more then one point in Scrabble you're not going to get a word. Everyone knows you're struggling if you're left with J, P, M, H and X.

In Greece though it's a whole new ballgame. I'm sure X is only worth one point. And then just to make it tougher to read they then insert all the mathematical symbols like Beta and Gamma. You might as well just insert the symbol for Pi I say. The words here either contain no vowels, or the whole alphabet. The result. The poor kids roam the streets unable to spell their name. Although this last point is unconfirmed as I couldn't speak one word of Greek to confirm this issue.


And the result set upon me. I was there in the middle of Athens central at 3am in the morning trying to figure out which direction I should be walking to get to the hostel after my flight had been delayed in Frankfurt. Shaking your head at the street signs doesn't make any difference. Resorting to reading the hostel directions instructions which say head downhill did though suffice in the end.

The first day I did what every tourist seems to do. I headed straight to the Acropolis. A fine bunch of ruins really. And well after seeing them, ruins of several sites they become just more rocks. Not a good sign for the appreciation of history if you find yourself at this stage.


Athens is unique. And well that's sadly how I'd explain it. It's not the prettiest city. The drivers are maniacs, the footpaths don't exist, motorcyclists mow down pedestrians, dogs roam everywhere, and its not cheap. But still there are highlights. Greek Food. There's Greek Salad, Halumi and Feta Cheese, Stuffed Tomatos, Roast Lamb, Lemon Potatoes, Slouvaki, and then some. This all worked out well as I like it all but for olives.

They also have their own version of the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier. Guarded day in and out by soldiers from the Ministry of Silly Walks. And for good measure they where shoes with Pom-Poms on the front. I'm sure the outfits have some sort of significant meaning, but for an ignorant tourist like myself that meaning was missed.

No free wireless

Argh! sorry but there have been no updates due to a lack of wireless internet facilities in the hostels here and there. I will resume to normal broadcasting shortly.